Narcissism in Online Dating

Narcissists thrive in the Internet Dating world. They don’t have to try hard to get the attention and supply they so desperately crave due to the number of users the apps have. There are red flags you can look out for, but since communication is kept mostly online and the number of users is constantly increasing due to the pandemic, narcissists don’t have to put in much work to hook their next source of supply.

A narcissist will pretend to be everything you want them to be, so be weary of being too upfront and disclosing information you might not want to share with someone who could possibly use it against you. They’re known for wearing a mask that will fall off eventually, so take your time.

Typically a narcissist will have their past partner, their current partner, and their future partner all at the same time. They need all three in order to keep themselves “whole”. They’re likely in the process of discarding their past partner, while devaluing their current partner and love-bombing their future partner. This is a typical cycle for someone with narcisstic personality disorder and this person will have a tendency to project their actions onto you and gaslight you into thinking you are crazy.

There are some red flags you can look out for to better protect yourself when dating online:

• Negativity

• Vagueness

• Avoidance

• Rapid Comfortability

• Overt Sexuality

• Inconsistency

• Generic Messages

• The Truth

• Pretentiousness

• Devaluation

• Seeing things as black & white

• Constantly comparing themselves to you and others

• Needing to be perfect

If you notice red flags when dating online, set firmer boundaries and ask more questions than you answer. Narcissists move very quickly and the best way to trip them up is by taking your time and asking targeting questions to expose their true self and make that mask fall off.